Back on the Pitch, Part Trois!

I was back on the pitch again after two weeks away. I had to miss the week before due to a knock to the back of my leg in the previous game. It felt great AND...our team won. This is almost as rare an occasion as the BoSox winning the World Series, so it feels good.

My kids have some great one-liners. For instance, when the little one - the one I call ELP, or Evil LIttle Princess - was mad at me, she turned to me and spat out, "mom only married you because she felt sorry for you." That is probably the best putdown I've received in 42 years of putdowns - and it was delivered by a 12-year-old.

Anyhow, I've been a bit injury prone this year. So injury prone, in fact, that the team has a pool on how many games I'll go until an injury hits. The over/under is two games. So I walk in to the house. Not limping. With a smile on my face because we won. The ELP looks at me and without hesitation says, "hey, you finished a game. Nice job!" Thanks, kid!

After a week of waiting I finally got a chance to see the new Gunners on a televised match, the away game against Manchester City. Yes, the same Aston Villa that had not yet beaten Arsenal in 15 years of trying in the top flight. I even wore my new away strip. Of course, they lost. Now I have to burn the new jersey in an ancient cleansing ceremony (I'm kidding, of course).

It's early yet and the Gunners have a game in hand on most teams, but this is already the worst start to an EPL season for the lads from North London. 1 point. 1 measly point in 2 games against Man City and Aston Villa. Wait until Chelsea and Man U. come knocking, eh?! Nicke Webster offers his thoughts on the Gunners.

Henry, in his first game back, looked, well rusty. Rusty as hell. The defense looks shaky and needs much playing time together. Justin Hoyte, in for the Princess (who apparently has joined the Jehovah's Witnesses or some such), committed the foul that gave Man City the shot from the dot and the goal. The team as a whole passed about as prettily as you would ever hope to see, but they were all build-up and no finish. It was like watching a bunch of 12-year-old girls run around in Arsenal Unis. You shoot. No, you shoot. Sigh....

And, contrary to what I wrote this weekend, JAR is is still a Gunner, but is not on the pitch and is now saying that he's done with Arsenal. Git.

Meanwhile, Man U. continues to slay all comers and Chelsea has righted the ship. If the Gunners don't find their touch soon, it's going to be a looong season...

...and Old Firm idiocy continues.

JAR will go far...I hope

All summer long we've had to listen to the sounds of JAR (aka Jose Antonio Reyes) singing about his love for Real Madrid and how he was ready to leave grimy England where the football is played by ruffians for sunny Spain, a land where soccer is still a gentleman's game played by handsome young men who never get grass stains on their shorts (unless of course, they're demonstrating the athletic feat of the pitch dive). Real Madrid, JAR's agent told us, wanted JAR. For his part, the fragile little forward called Real Madrid his "dream club." They were Kid Rock to his Pamela Anderson. Their love for each other could not be denied.

How fleeting is summer love. It now looks like JAR is on his way home, but not to Real Madrid. Instead, he'll be practicing his frail style of football for RM's city rivals, Athletico Madrid. While there's a certain poetic justice in the Wantaway Kid being sent to Los Galacticos' rival, a much lesser light in the football galaxy, I will just be glad to be rid of the whiny git. Farewell and godspeed JAR.

Also to the good, Arsenal beat Dinamo Zagreb 2-1 in a Champions League qualifier at Emirates last night...and Chelsea, the mighty Chelsea, lost to a shop vac of a side, Middlesbrough 2-1.

It's Wednesday, which means it's time for EPL matches...unless you're Arsenal, then you're hosting Dinamo Zagreb at Emirates, though up 3 away goals. Arsene Wenger is feeling crotchety. He's playing catch-up over EPL fixtures, trying to sell the Princess, chasing after William Gallass (a good idea, IMO), and trying to talk down JAR's agent.

I'm supposed to have a match tonight, but my back's been bothering me. I'll have to see if I can get in to see the chiropractor and get right before kick-off. Oh, I hate getting old...

EPL Season Underway

Not a glorious start for the Gunners at their new digs. Only securing a point against an Aston Villa team they'd not lost to in 16 matches has to be viewed as a serious underachievement. By all accounts of the game, the Gunners ran the field and showered the goal with shots but could only figure out how to get one of the onions in the back of the onion bag. Still, a point's better than a goose egg and its a long season. My money's on the young Gunners to make a serious run for 2nd place. No, I'm not feverish enough to claim a legitimate shot at first...

That belongs to Chelsea and Manchester United. Man u would have problems scoring goals without RVN, I said. They would struggle with the lingering issues between CRon and Rooney, I said. Blather! Rooney scored two, CRon one (nice assist from Rooney) and Saha netted the first in the game to blast Glass-is-not-half-Fulham. Chelsea likewise, had little trouble putting down the Citizens from the other side of town. Terry, Lampard and Drogba scored (all headers, if I remember correctly from the highlights). Both teams appear to be the class to chase in the EPL.

Liverpool struggled seriously in tying Sheffield United, a result that might make many forget Arsenal's difficulties with AV. I still think this side is much improved from last season, with the pace of Craig Bellamy up front. And Benitez is the genius you forget about because of Mourinho, SAF and Wenger.

On the positive front, Tottenham lost 2-0!

Start the Season Off Right

So, I wake up this morning, and it's the morning after another soccer tournament. I'm bleary-eyed and in need of caffeine, a little dazed from driving and having watched too many soccer matches featuring 12-year-old girls; just stumbling along and then. I realize. The Community Shield is on TV! It's EPL, baby! And best of all, Liverpool puts down Chelsea, who looks a mite tepid, other than Andriy Shevchenko, who seems to have rockets attached to his boots. Six more days and Arsenal takes the pitch!

I also heard the Mighty Diamonds' "Pass the Kouchie" on my favorite station, KEXP, and can't get the tune out of my head. You may remember the very similar hit from the 1980s, "Pass the Dutchie" by Musical Youth.

Science gets a bad rap, fer sure. Global warming. Bird Flu. Killer asteroids. A million ways the world is going to kill us all. But there is good news, too. First off, beer can help treat polluted wastewater. The byproducts of beer brewing are effective filtrants to toxic wastewater (and take much less energy to produce than conventional methods). Drink more beer. It's for Mother Earth! Secondly, I read in New Scientist that research has revealed that attractive people are 36 percent more likely to produce daughter than sons. With 3 daughters, I'm feeling pretty darn handsome. Thanks, science!

Baptista?

Julio Baptista for JAR? I'm all for that. I saw Baptista Wednesday night and he looked great. JAR's unhappy, he's not been that productive, and he'll never be physical enough for the EPL. Send him home and let's take a player we wanted all along.

Meanwhile, Henry is confident about the upcoming season. I'm hopeful. I still think they'll have a tough go wresting the title from Chelsea, but a clear shot at 2nd place is in order.

Things are not looking so good for our good friend David Beckham. He's been dropped from the England squad for its first friendly under coach Steve McLaren. Long overdue in my book. There's got to be some right wing midfielders in England that can also play defense and run. It's not all free kicks on the pitch, you know.

Another Real Madrid star - Ruud Van Nistelroy - has also received the drop treatment, being left out of the squad for a friendly against Ireland. RVN is still an awesome striker, but it looks like his relationship with Coach Marco Van Basten is not so great.